Who told you that was true?

Have you ever had someone you respect say something … and suddenly you start questioning yourself?

Yup ... me too.

I had a moment like that a few months ago. I asked someone I really respect if she follows Mel Robbins and she immediately said, “I hate her.”

And just like that, my brain went into overdrive …
Wait ... should I not like her?
Did I miss something?
Am I wrong for liking her?

That right there? That’s what we’re talking about today.

How fast we take someone else’s opinion—and quietly turn it into our own.

In this episode, we’re getting into:

• Why your brain is wired to “borrow” opinions from people you respect
• How beliefs get formed without you even realizing it
• The concept of “agreements” (inspired by Don Miguel Ruiz) and how you’ve probably signed a few you didn’t mean to
• Why not everything that sounds smart is actually true for you
• A simple 3-second pause that can shift everything

Here’s the truth most people don’t realize:

If you don’t question what you’re agreeing to … you end up building your life based on other people’s fears, preferences, and bad moods.

And that’s not the game you’re here to play.

This episode is your reminder that you don’t need to argue with people or prove anything.  You just need to stop letting their opinions quietly rewrite yours.

Take what feels true.
Leave the rest.

Your takeaway:

Next time someone says something that hits you sideways, pause for a second and ask yourself:

Do I want to carry this… or leave it with them?

That question alone will change how you move.

If this episode hit for you, share it with someone who needs to hear it—and come tell me what you’re choosing not to carry anymore.

p.s. HI KIM!!!

To work with me:  https://www.thefengshuichick.ca/coaching-packages

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Website:  www.thefengshuichick.ca

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Transcript

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A New Monday Release Standard

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hey there. Before we get started today, I want to say a huge hi to my new friend Kim from Lloyd Minster. I found out that Kim's whole day was thrown off because my episode didn't drop early in the morning. And we do not want that. I do not want that. So a huge hi, but also a very big thank you because from now on, I'm upping the standard. Every single Monday at 5 a.m. I will be dropping a new podcast. You can count on it. I will be here. I promise you. We don't want Kim's days to be thrown off. We start Monday in the best way possible. And that includes this podcast. So thanks for the message, Kim. I am so thrilled that you're here listening to me every single week. And let's up our fucking game. Let's go.

Quick Intro And No Fluff

SPEAKER_00 0:56

I'm so glad that you're here. You're listening to what the fuck did she just say? With your host, that's me, Santa Placelet. I'm all about living our best life and finding our zone of brilliance and then removing the resistance so that we can go all in. I say random crazy shit, which is why I called this podcast the way that I did it. And I really hate long, drawn-out intros. So let's fucking go.

A Triggered Reaction To Disagreement

SPEAKER_00 1:28

A few months ago, I was getting some energy work done by this woman that I greatly respect. We always have the greatest of conversations. I love going to see her for that reason. It's not just that I feel better energetically and that I work to heal some blocks and heal some trauma and release some crap that I'm holding on to that I can't get rid of on my own, but also because we have really deep philosophical discussions. And I feel like we challenge each other. There was a moment where we were talking about something I don't remember what it was, and it doesn't really matter, but it related to something I had heard Mel Robbins say on her podcast. I said to her, So do you follow Mel Robbins at all? And her response was, no, I hate her. And here's what's interesting about this. I could feel in my body that I pulled back into safety. I could feel it in my body. I was so acutely aware that my energy completely shifted in that moment. I paid particular attention to the self-talk, the things that went on in my mind in what seemed like a split second. And the first thing I went to is, oh my gosh, she doesn't like her. Should I not like her? Am I wrong? Is she awful? Is there something? Did I miss something? Why would this person that I respect so greatly not like Mel Robbins? And am I a loser for liking her? All of those things happen within a split second. And all of those thoughts became a very physical feeling in my body. It's so wild to me how fast we hand our opinions over to someone else without even realizing it. Here's the other thing. When she said no, I hate her, she said it with such confidence. And that confidence is a bit contagious. So even if it's personally wrong for me, I could hear the confidence in her voice. And that's what made me question mine. If you think of any of the conversations that you've had where someone has said something and it's kind of put you, set you on your feet, like this business is too saturated. Botox will paralyze your entire body. You have to be on TikTok. Or someone saying to you, that's risky, and you start to play smaller. When I was quitting my six-figure government job, I remember telling people that I was going to quit. I was going to retire early. I was going to quit and I was doing my business. I had people saying, Are you fucking kidding me? That is insane. How can you walk away from a government job? There's always going to be those people that have a differing opinion on what you know to be true. And what I love about having non-judgmental awareness and discernment in every single situation, where we can stay very, very aware of how we feel, of what we think, what we're saying to ourselves, we have that capacity to really mull it around in our

Beliefs As Agreements You Accept

SPEAKER_00 4:53

mind. Do I believe this, this new thing? Or am I going to reject it and believe what I've always believed? If you have ever read The Four Agreements with Don Miguel Ruiz, you'll know that he says, an agreement is a belief that we accept as truth. And a lot of times we just believe something like our beliefs come from when we were children. Our parents said something or a caregiver said something. And we were relying on them for survival, quite frankly. So anything that they said or did, we sort of took it on as truth. We'll believe those things to be true until such time as something comes along to challenge that belief. And when that does happen, then we have the capacity, we have the opportunity not to just immediately abandon what we believed and not immediately to shit on the new belief, but we have the beautiful process of sitting and thinking to ourselves, ah, this challenge is what I've always believed. Is this new belief right? Or is my belief still right to me? The thing is, she can hate Mel Robbins and I can love Mel Robbins, and we're both right because Mel Robbins is not for her, and Mel Robbins is for me in this moment. She may change her mind, I may change mine. We both get to be right, even though we disagree on this certain topic. And that is what is beautiful about this level of awareness. So often, one of two things happens, unfortunately. We either hear a differing opinion and we double down and we dig our heels in, and we're resistant to listen to anything that that other person says, or we immediately start to question what we think and we take on the other person's beliefs before we really truly question is this true for me? I know it's true for her in this moment, but is it true for me in this moment? It's so funny because in that moment where our beliefs are challenged, our energy shifts so fast. But the second you notice it, that's your power because awareness creates choice. And choice is what creates that self-trust. You know how many times a business coach has said you need to be on your personal Facebook page, or you can't sell this, or you can't do that, or you have to do this, or you won't be able to have a business. I mean, it is absolutely endless how many opinions were shoved down my throat by business coaches who I paid. It's why I do things differently. It's why I coach differently. I want you to think outside the box, but I want you to really analyze what is true for you. My coaching is different because I really want to bring out your intuition, your awareness to the point where you know what is real for you. You are confident in what is real for you, and you are also okay with other people believing something different. That's where the power is.

Testing A Viral Psychology Quote

SPEAKER_00 8:16

I heard a quote uh this morning. I was on Facebook, and there was it was a psychology page. The psychologist had said, if someone's behavior is confusing, they're lying. That was interesting because in my body, I felt this like, that's super good. Oh my gosh, I love that. But I knew enough to sit with it, to sit in the pause, to have that power of pause. And so I waited for a bit and I sat in it and I asked, is this always true? Do I want to live by this? Does this feel true to me in my body? Are there examples in my life where I have felt that someone's behavior was confusing and I realized that they were lying? Bigger than that, are there examples where this isn't true for me? I really value discernment and I value the knowledge that just because I hear something doesn't make it true. But I need to sort of take some time and mull it over in my mind and decide: is this something that I want to agree to? Is this an agreement that I believe is true for me in this moment? If you don't question what you're agreeing to, you end up building a life based on someone else's fears, someone else's preferences, someone else's bad attitude and bullshit, their limiting beliefs. And we don't want that. We want you to curate your agreements, curate your beliefs based on what you know deep in your gut, what is true for you.

The Pause That Builds Self Trust

SPEAKER_00 9:59

So your new standard, start to think about when someone says something that is not in agreement with what you currently believe, I want you to pay attention to how you feel in your body. Are you retracting? Are you recoiling? Are you feeling fear or are you feeling aggressiveness? Are you feeling like you want to argue that shit? And once you do, once you just take three seconds for real, just a few seconds, feel in your body, and then ask yourself, do I do I believe this? Do I want to believe this? Does it feel true in my body at this time? And do I want this to shape how I see the world? Do I want to take this belief on to be part of who I am? If you do, hey, that's amazing. But if you don't, that's amazing too. And then once you decide, do I agree with this person, do I not agree with this person, is it beneficial for me to agree to this new standard? You can kind of decide. You get to let that person believe what she believes, and you're still okay. You can believe something completely different than another person, and both of you can be right at the same time. There is no need to justify your decision and your beliefs by convincing the other person that you're right and they're wrong. That's I think where we get so fucked up in the world, is that we can both have opinions and both of us can be right and they can be opposing. And in order for us to be right, we don't have to prove someone else wrong. We don't have to sway everyone to our belief system. We're just gonna be who we are and put out in the world what we believe until we choose to challenge that belief and maybe take on a different one. Be really choosy, stay in awareness and be really, really picky about the new agreements that you choose to accept in because they start to shape your life. They start to build your life on it. Once you do that, if you start looking maybe at the beliefs that you hold that are holding you back, those limiting thoughts that keep you small, because you didn't come here to be small. You came here on this planet, was placed on this planet with your own special magic. And it's about time that you step into it. If you're like me, you have less years ahead of you than you have behind you. There is no time to be holding on to things that absolutely hold you back. It's time to fly.

Choose Your Standards And Fly

SPEAKER_00 12:47

Thank you so much for listening. I hope you've had some laughs, maybe some ideas, and that you've been inspired to take some type of action toward the life you've always dreamed up. If you feel so called, I would love it if you would share with your festive. Leave a review down below. I look forward to bringing along, and I will see you in the next episode.