WTF did she just say?
Oh my goshhhhhhhhhh welcome to my podcast!!! I'm so excited that you're here and I am honoured that you choose to place ME in your AirPods every week!!!
Here's a bit about me:
My name is Sandra. I'm a business coach for women, a feng shui practitioner and a 2x national leadership award winner. In saying all of that though, I feel like I'm just a girl from Saskatchewan, who is put on this earth to inspire you to step into your power ... right fuckin' now.
I think that all too often, we convince ourselves that there is nothing we can do ... that our life "is what it is" and that ONE DAY we might be able to have the life that we dreamed of.
Uhmmmm NO.
That's bullshit.
Sorry ... but it's true. In a split second, you can choose differently. In THIS moment, you can take that courageous step toward the life you desire. It's my job, my gift and my obsession to help you share your sparkle with the world and I'm excited to get started.
You got this. Let's go.
Sandra
WTF did she just say?
Fear of judgement ... and the lesson I learned about other people's opinions the hard way
I also dive into the power of journaling for personal empowerment. With our complex minds, writing down our thoughts can help us take control and process the opinions of others without letting them destroy our confidence. Embrace this opportunity to discover how judgment is not the truth, and the only truth is what's true for us in the moment. Grab a pen and notebook and get ready to be inspired to take action, find your zone of brilliance, and live your best life.
**** if you go back to episode 45, you’ll notice that I tell you that you should start to create your business FIRST and THEN create websites and do all the stuff if/when you need them. THIS story is how I come by that knowledge - it was all such a waste of time when I look back. Let’s LEAP first before doing the “busy work”.
Are you interested in learning how to Feng Shui your space to build your business??? I got you covered!!! Send my team a message at: info@thefengshuichick.ca
Random Sandra-isms
See the blessing in the mess.
>> The Power Project >> https://www.thefengshuichick.ca/offers/rJT6wWfU
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WEBSITE https://www.thefengshuichick.ca
I'm so glad that you're here. You're listening to what the fuck did she just say With your host? that's me, sandra Presley. I'm all about living our best life and finding our zone of brilliance and then removing the resistance so that we can go all in. I say random, crazy shit, which is why I called this podcast the way that I did, and I really hate long drawn out intros, so let's fucking go.
Speaker 1:I started my entrepreneurial journey in 2010. I had just received my Feng Shui practitioner certification and I was bound and determined that I was going to do this for a business because I loved it so much. This had been something that I had been just intuitively doing since I was little and learning about for years. Like my entire life At that time, probably no less than 20 years I had been learning about Feng Shui. It was just something that was so fun. It was different than what I was doing as a career and I really, really wanted to help women make a difference. I could see women struggling and really wanting a different life. I knew that there was things that they could do in their space that would just make life a little bit easier. I started a business that was called transformational design. I loved it because it represented to me transforming your space to transform your life. It was brilliant. I paid for a website designer. I functioned my business cards with the information that I had learned from my certification. I mean it was beautiful. I loved it.
Speaker 1:I went into the registries office so that I could register my business name, so that I could get a license. The check across the counter said to me you're calling your business what I'm all proud Transformational design. I'm thinking to myself ooh, maybe she wants to, maybe she'll be excited about this. I'm the only Feng Shui practitioner in this area. This is so exciting, it's just going to fly. This is such a great idea. Everyone needs a Feng Shui practitioner.
Speaker 1:She said well, that's an awfully long name. If you know me, i don't shy away from confrontation. I don't feel like it's a bad thing at all. I think confrontation or just honest conversation and we shouldn't be scared of it. When she said this to me, i thought, okay, well, bold ballsy, not your fucking place, but okay, let's go there.
Speaker 1:So I stood there, paused for a second, raised my left eyebrow like I do, and said does it not fit in the squares on your form? And she said, no, it fits. And I said okay. So what's the problem? Well, it's just a long word to write out. Okay and Well, nothing.
Speaker 1:But I mean, are you sure that this is the name that you want to create, like that you want to use? And I thought to myself okay, we like, i'm paying you money, i'm giving you the name. Why are we discussing this? Of course, this is the fucking name that I want to use. I am here with a hundred dollars or whatever it happened to be at the time. I just registered the dang name.
Speaker 1:I got in my car, phoned, my husband said okay, name is registered. And he says yeah. And I said, but the chick at the registry's office said this to me And you know my husband is like oh, what does she know? Why would she care? Like, just take the money, register the name, right. But here's the thing When she said it, it put this tiny little bit of doubt in the back of my mind.
Speaker 1:I started thinking is this name too long? I started creating stories. Hmm, she sees a lot of names, she registers a lot of business names. Is my name too long? That's what she was trying to say to me, because no other business name is this long. Maybe I shouldn't have chosen that name. Maybe I should have walked out of the registry's office that day and gone back when I found a better name.
Speaker 1:This name sucks. I don't like my email address now because my email address was Sandra at transformationaldesignca. Wow, that was using every single letter in the alphabet, right. And so I started to just ruminate over it and tell myself, oh, this is a stupid name, i shouldn't have used this name. And I started to play small. I didn't want to promote the name. Now I had this website that I had paid for that looked so beautiful, but it had this stupid name transformational design on it. Now I didn't even want to show people my website because I didn't like the name. Now, full disclosure. I still like the name.
Speaker 1:The email was a little long, but I really did like the name. It really made sense. You transform your space, you transform your life What the fuck. Great name. And also, i've seen longer names. So there's that.
Speaker 1:But at the time I was about 38, it was my very first business And I didn't know that people are losers and that everyone might have a comment and we don't have to listen to them all. I started playing small just because of this one comment that I allowed to get in my brain. And then there were more, because that's what happens with entrepreneurial, because that's what happens with entrepreneurship, right, there's always someone that says why are you doing that? You should be doing this. And you get all of these ideas in your mind that what you wanted to do, what you love to do, the thing that you're so driven to be a part of, maybe it's wrong When you start to doubt yourself.
Speaker 1:After I got my registration, i registered my business and I started doing consultations and I was nervous, but I was putting a ton of work into them and the clients that I had were getting results. I was not shocked but so happy And they would come to me and they would say, oh my gosh, that's a guest five. I got that big, huge goal that I had. Well, it just happened. Thank you so much. I can't believe it. Feng Shui's magic. And I was so proud of myself even though I wasn't using the name transformational design I mean very rarely I was usually like, yeah, i'm not a free sleeper Feng Shui practitioner.
Speaker 1:And so I had joined a small business group of women in business group And the one woman who was the founder of this group I had done a Feng Shui consultation for. She loved it so much. she wanted me to share what I had learned to the group. So I said, great, i will be the speaker on this day. I will do maybe an hour, if that's okay. By the end these women will be able to design their homes for business success. They're going to be able to map out their homes. They're going to be able to make some changes in their space as soon as they go home. That will help bring them money, help bring them clients and really expand their businesses to the way that they wanted them to. I was so damn excited about it. I'd worked so hard on it. I had handouts and everything and clipboards and, like I was killing it.
Speaker 1:I went into this presentation so confident, so sure in myself. I knew what I knew. I knew that what I was going to share was going to change their businesses and change their lives. I started talking and about halfway through I could see one of the women in the group was leaning back in her chair, folding her arms, and I'm pretty sure that I saw smoke coming out of her ears. I mean, she was pissed and I was trying to think what did I say? Why is this her body language, what's going on? All of a sudden, she can't contain herself. I just happen to be talking about the love and marriage, or love at relationships, which is the back right corner of your house. That way, if you're standing in the front, the architectural front door, and you're looking inside your house, like into your house, it's in the back right corner.
Speaker 1:I started talking about that and she lost it. She was so angry. She said how dare you say these things? I'm thinking to myself okay, girl, what I said was this is an energy pattern and you can use the back right corner, which is your intimate relationships, marriage area, to strengthen your relationship. Well, what I did not know was that she had just left her husband. She was extremely angry and I probably got what he deserved. She was so angry, she was so mad, she was like just spit nails, pissed off.
Speaker 1:And so, again, i'm the girl who doesn't mind confrontation. I stayed calm, i explained what I meant. We had a discussion and she sat back in her chair. She seemed okay and left. I then was told oh, please don't take that personally. This girl's going through some stuff I just didn't know at the time when I was doing the presentation, that she had just left her husband, but it all sort of made a lot more sense.
Speaker 1:But what happened was it was the next thing that stuck in my mind. It was the thing that was running around in the back of my subconscious going you've got to stay small. What if someone else misunderstands? What if someone else misinterprets what you're saying? What if people judge you? What if people judge your kids for what you're doing? Why can't you just sell insurance, sell something that people won't question? Why can't you just do what everyone else does? Now, i don't love to do what everyone else does. That's the problem, right.
Speaker 1:But as I was really, as I was working through this business, working my ass off, doing so much for my clients, spending hours and hours and hours on the computer, writing up, writing up like huge reports, analyzing the pictures that I had taken, analyzing and seeing if there was maybe something else that I could also add to the consultation, when I had done it, in the back of my mind, i was scared. I held myself back because of these two women. No, i held myself back because of the things that I started to tell myself that they prompted. It was my reaction to their comments, which could have been neutral to me. I chose to make the mean something. I chose to make the mean a lot of things, and those a lot of things ended up to be the reason that I walked away from that business.
Speaker 1:I ended up taking an interior design diploma because I thought, okay, well, feng Shui has a little too woo for 2010. Maybe I'm going to do interior design and I can just add Feng Shui, it'll be like my party truck on the side. This was my way of playing small. Halfway through that diploma, i thought this isn't me. I don't want to do interior design, i just want to be a Feng Shui practitioner. Then I started gaining weight. I found Beachbody and I decided I was going to be a Beachbody coach. There was a lot of mindset work to that, because we weren't really encouraged to have before and after pictures on our websites. Oh my gosh, if you feel insecure at all about your body, just place your before pictures on social media for everyone to see. Oh my goodness. I started doing a lot of more mindset work and I worked through so much.
Speaker 1:I found that there was always something that people would say that stuck. It was like I couldn't let it go. I couldn't let it go and I started thinking about it and thinking about it and trying to roll it around in my mind. I was trying to roll it around in my mind in order to negate it. What was happening was I was giving it more energy and I was giving it more fuel and I was giving it more stories that held me back.
Speaker 1:What I've noticed this year and for those of you who don't know, i have a year-long container called the Power Project that I've created and it really has been so pivotal for me I really have learned so much about myself and I've been able to strip away all of these thoughts. I've been able to strip away all of the beliefs and the things that I've taken off from other people, how I've made things mean, things that they didn't. I mean, i've really really been able to see how we hold ourselves back. It's amazing, when you write something out in your journal and read it back, how completely fucking ridiculous it seems. I wrote something in February of this year. It was so raw It was. I wish I had it in front of me, but it was on a day where I was really just feeling like garbage And in my journal it said I don't know why I don't belong. I feel like garbage. Why do I feel this despair? I don't know how to get out of it. I don't know how to release this depression. It was so raw And it was real. Everybody was only just in that moment.
Speaker 1:I pride myself on being really very positive. I pride myself on being able to think outside the box. I pride myself on being able to help people see the other side. I pride myself on being able to do hard things. I pride myself on being able to see the blessing in the mess. I pride myself on being able to stay emotionally intelligent, for the most part through some of the hardest lessons I've ever had to learn. And yet I wrote that in February of this year.
Speaker 1:What I've realized so much, especially through the process of journaling every single day, through the process of finding our personal power in this power project, is that our minds are so damn complex And we are not what we think. They're just things we tell ourselves And when we can write them down, when we can speak them out, when we can get to a place where we are safe enough to write out what we're thinking, without judgment on ourselves or anyone else for that matter, and just know that it's cathartic to write it out. And when we write it out, we can get rid of it. Wow, if I could go back to that 2010 version of myself, if I could get to the place where I could process what people were saying in a way that wasn't destroying to me but rather empowering to me, where would I be? And this is really what I love to help my clients with.
Speaker 1:What I love the power project for, because I think so many times we listen to someone else's opinions, we hear what they say and it ruminates in our it goes round and around and around in our heads until, all of a sudden, we fucking own it. It becomes the thing we tell ourselves, and it doesn't have to. We can truly get to this place where we can sit and realize that someone else's opinion is not fact, that judgment is not truth and that what is true for us in this moment is the only truth that there is. Thank you so much for listening. I hope you've had some laughs, maybe some ideas, and that you've been inspired to take some type of action toward the life you've always dreamed of. If you feel so called, i would love it if you would share with your besties and leave a review down below. I look forward to bringing you along those journey and I will see you in the next episode.
